Follow yet somehow apple fanboys still exist, tripping over themselves and foaming at their mouths trying to justify this garbage

@mia "as the first time a user runs a new executable, Apple delays execution while waiting for a reply from their server" what the SHIT ASS FUCK

@velartrill microsoft did it first! but only with downloaded executables. that was fun, waiting 30+ seconds sometimes before i could execute the damn thing

@velartrill @mia the new iMplant releases a gentle puff of fair-trade dopamine when an Apple user positively interacts with sponsored content and a stern compliance-supporting electric shock when attempting to access unverified content
@videomurder @mia now installing Apple Symbiote. spread your legs to continue

@mia ”Somehow” = Apple having a sublime marketing department, highly specialized in exploiting human consumerist behavior.

Instead of poking fun at their victims, let’s come up with concrete and realistic strategies to counter this problem.

@chloekek i’m not going to reinvent socialism from first principles on fedi

@mia Then consider yourself muted for unconstructive unironic criticism.

@mia tbh watching apple users enthusiastically running back again and again to get fucked til they bleed with the mummified cock of steve jobs by an unfeeling robot gives me the same feeling as dealing with those women who insist on dating violent, abusive men over and over again and just refuse to even consider anyone else.

@velartrill actual quote i saw on IRC the other day:

“i liked choking on Steve Job's cock before it started tasting of necrosis”

but apple has been getting worse even while jobs was still alive – they have not produced a single robust machine ever since they got into laptops

@chloekek haha are you for real? i'm telling your mom you're up past your bedtime, kiddo, it's a school day tomorrow
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Tōhō, socialism, and a cute mouse.